- In an Instagram post, popular life coach and psychologist Benjamin Zulu discouraged parents from confiding their conflicts with their children
- He explained that it is unethical and immoral to share marital problems with children as no one goes later to debrief the child when they reconcile
- Zulu came out strong in defending the emotional well being of the children in his post cautioning parents not to add more burden to them with their brokenness
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By Mourrine Wambugu
Famous Kenyan life coach and counselling psychologist Benjamin Zulu has cautioned parents from confiding their marital struggles and problems with their children, taming it as unethical and immoral.
In an Instagram post, @benjaminzuluke discouraged parents from sharing their conflicts with their children. He said:
“You are getting it wrong if after you conflict with your partner you go confiding in your child about it.”
He advised parents to seek emotional support from grownups who can give objective feedback.
“Seek emotional support from grownups who can give objective feedback. Let your child be a child, not your co-wife or an emotional second wife,” he added.
Zulu added that sharing such information with children is unethical and immoral as it confuses them about love and marriage.
“Children should not be forced to choose one parent over the other or to mediate between them, at least not while they are still children under your care,” he wrote.
The popular life coach pointed out that no one later debriefs the child after reconciliation, and the built-up tension destroys them silently.
Zulu further stated that the acid parents put into their children eats them quietly and that they should allow children to be children.
Previously, Zulu encouraged parents to heal because they have children who don’t deserve to be bruised by their brokenness.
He said for parents to heal, they ought to face some ugly demons of their past hurts and unresolved issues.
“If we don’t bring light to those dark corners of our personalities, we will continue to cast shadows on those needed our light in order to find their own,” he said.
He discouraged parents from overburdening their already burdened children with their brokenness.